Does Higher Education Guarantee a Higher Quality of Life?

Higher education is defined as the optional last stage of learning that happens after one completes secondary education. It is often delivered at colleges, conservatories, seminaries, academies, colleges, institutes of technology and universities. Previously, higher education was limited to the elite members of society, but after World War II, the majority of developed and developing countries increased the participation of people in higher education with developed countries progressing towards universal.

The objective of many young people today is to afford a comfortable lifestyle by having better job opportunities, which are believed to be facilitated by higher education. 84% of Americans believe that higher education is extremely vital to get ahead in life. 66% of individuals who failed to graduate from college wish they had, while 62% felt that going to an institute of higher education would have helped them significantly improve their current standards of living.

The job market is believed to be more open to graduates with higher education as compared to those who failed to continue with their education after high school.  Furthermore, graduates have been reported to earn more money in comparison to non-graduates. A 2002 study done by the US Census Bureau concluded that increased earnings went hand in hand with higher levels of education with doctorate degrees being the exception. The average earning of a high school, college and university graduate was found to be $21,569, $27,361 and $42,783 respectively.

The importance of higher education goes beyond career opportunities and income brackets. It has a significant impact on other aspects of life as well such as healthy lifestyle choices.  Better physical and mental health together with high life expectancy has been directly correlated with high socioeconomic status (measured by the attained level of education, total family income, and career status).  This is due to the fact that more money means access to better healthcare and food options. Higher education is also believed to help individuals gain the desire and ability to make better lifestyle choices like eating habits and exercise.

Improved self-esteem and personal satisfaction have also been attributed to higher levels of education. Studies done by the College Board have discovered that people with additional schooling were more equipped to handle mental issues and achieved a high level of satisfaction while doing so. They showed a greater sense of personal development and discipline and were more involved in civic activities.

In summary, the days when only a high school diploma was enough to get a rewarding career are long gone. Most of the world’s economies have moved away from manufacturing to knowledge-based industries that require additional education. Not only does a higher level of education train one in a specific field covering a wide range of issues such as analytical thinking, effective communication skills, organization, and self-discipline, but it opens doors to a better quality of life, health, and opportunities.  High school education is simply one step towards achieving this.

How to Revise the Essay Above

Revising an essay means altering the content of your essay to make it more effective. It could be by adding, deleting or moving some texts. Before you submit your essay, it is important to go through it to ensure that you have no grammar and typo errors; and even more vital, ensure that you do not have any gaps in your content and logic.

In order to tackle the revision of the essay above, the following algorithm would be most effective:

  1. Examine the theme by other authors- It is important to ensure that the representation of the essay fits the style and emotion you want to pass through. By examining the approach used by other authors, you could develop your unique sense of style appropriate for your message. It will help you develop a plan of action. In the essay above, the message is most likely pro-higher education and the style is persuasive. In the revision, your points should be more persuasive.
  2. Research the topic extensively- In order to write comprehensively about higher education, it is important to research the topic to ensure that even though the intention is to persuade the reader; who is assumed to have little information on the matter, he or she is not misled in the process. Double check the evidence and ensure that it is up to date. The current norm is to use sources that are not more than ten years long.

For instance, the source used in the third paragraph of the essay is dated 2004; this is more than ten years ago and is not the most appropriate representation of the current situation.

  1. Rethink the structure of the essay and the clarity of your introduction, supporting evidence, and conclusion- Many essays follow the structure of introduction, main body, and conclusion, which also follow a certain structure.
  • For example, the introduction is preferred to begin with a hook such as a compelling story or an interesting fact. It can also provide some background- although not necessary. What is undebatable though is the existence of a thesis. This is the essence of an essay as it sums up the point you are trying to pass across. The essay above lacks a thesis statement which is a big no. This is among the parts that are in dire need of revision.

For instance, the thesis statement in the first paragraph could be:

“Most people who have acquired a higher education have a higher quality of life.”:

  • On the part of the main body- each paragraph should begin with a topic sentence that further develops the thesis statement supported by evidence. While the essay has tried to add supporting evidence in most of the paragraphs, the evidence in the fourth paragraph is not based on any research.

For instance, this segment in the fourth paragraph “This is because more money means access to better healthcare and food options. Higher education is also believed to help individuals gain the desire and ability to make better lifestyle choices like eating habits and exercise.”

Revised segment: a collaborative study done by professors from the University of Colorado, New York University and the University of North Colorado discovered people with a lower level of education were more likely to suffer from cardiovascular disease or cancer.

  • While writing the conclusion, it is important to avoid obvious statements like “in conclusion” or “in summary” as done in the essay above.
  • As you are concluding your thoughts, it is important to avoid adding new information. For instance: Most of the world’s economies have moved away from manufacturing to knowledge-based industries that require additional education
  • Finally, read the conclusion out loud to ensure it is an effective ending.
  1. Ask yourself if you have achieved your objective. “Have you managed to give an answer to the topic question?” If not, do not be afraid to rewrite. Ensure you do not overload the reader. Even though the purpose is to provide support or rejection of the topic question, it is important that you do not overwhelm the reader with information.

Now that you have dealt with the general issues, it is time to tackle the specific ones:

  1. Look out for word repetition
  2. Ensure you are writing in the right voice. The essay above should be written in the third person, and it should not have spelling or grammatical errors.

Tips on How to Make a Successful Essay Revision

Even though each author has a preferred formula for revising their work, some methods work better than others.

The following tips will help you make a successful revision:

  • Give yourself ample time after writing before you begin revising- it is not advisable to revise your essay while you write as it could be difficult to realize the organization and grammatical errors you are making. Set it aside for a few hours- even days; however, do not procrastinate. It will help you establish a new perspective on the issue, and it would be easier to find errors.
  • Print a hard copy- sometimes when you are revising your essay on a laptop or computer, things could get difficult. Holding a paper in your hands will help you focus more on the revision. You could use pens, sticky notes, and highlighters to make self-notes.
  • Read your essay backward- this will help you analyze logic more effectively. By constructing a backward outline, you will be able to filter out any information that is not useful to your agenda.
  • Read your essay out loud- It is easier to catch more errors by reading out loud rather than if you read it silently. Reading out loud to somebody else can also give you a different outlook on your work and help you catch even more errors.
  • Accept peer critique- Make an oral presentation to your peers. They can identify the shortcoming in your logic more quickly than you and help you correct it. You could read someone else’s essay in return to improve your revising skills.
  • Allow yourself to accept suggestions.
  • Proofread your essay.